you're only as old as you feel?

Sometimes I am sure I would love another child in our family, and then, I wake up with arthritis in my hands and I have a hard time with the kids' car seats, opening granola bars and hooking up the nursing bra. It's a little depressing. Maybe I am too old to do it again. Maybe I need to see my doctor about the arthritis . . .

stuff that won't make it to the baby book . . .

but that should probably be recorded anyway.

This is an excerpt from an email I wrote to Marc (May 17, 9:44 am):

Noah is completely naked eating a cereal bar, and spent the last half hour playing Lego also completely naked. I got him undressed when he had a potty accident (just didn't get his pants down in time). Of course I was changing Molly at the time. I put her in the crib in just a diaper (no plastic pants) to go clean Noah up. By the time I got back to Molly, of course she had peed, so I had to change the crib bedding too. It's all about pee today.

today

I played soccer with Noah in the backyard as Molly slept in her stroller, and the laundry was drying on the line. I wish every day of my mat-leave could be like this one.

a little about noah

I was just looking over my posts and noticed there was more about Molly than Noah, so I'm going to correct that. It's so easy to gush about the baby, especially when the pre-schooler going through a defiant phase. I mean, who really wants to write something like "my son only said Mommy, I don't like you 4 times today".

Noah is a great little kid. He's really funny and has his own quirky sense of humour. He loves to wear hats and pretend to be a spaceman or an explorer. He is learning to pronounce the letter L.

Last night at supper, Marc was telling Noah some jokes:

Marc: Why did the boy throw his clock out the window?

Noah: Because he was in a bad mood?

(silence, followed by Marc and I laughing)

Noah: Is that right?

*******

Marc: How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Noah: Throw a ball and hit it?

thumb

Molly found her thumb this week, and I am very happy about it. The first day she found it, she kept falling asleep every time she started sucking. It was pretty funny actually since she seemed to be dropping off completely against her will.

the point

Perhaps wondering whether we will have more children is not really "the point". At the moment I am more concerned about being able to spend more time with the ones we have.

I need to figure out how to be less dependant on the income from my full time job and figure out a more creative and flexible way to make some money. It doesn't have to be a lot, especially if we can stop paying for full-time childcare.

molly's first word is

hug!

Molly's happy noises sound like she is saying "hug". I'm happy to oblige.

circle time

A quick Noah moment: Noah loves to sing, and he loves circle time at playgroup. He also loves VeggieTales. Today, he tried to combine these things and requested that the group sing the Larry-Boy Groove. (If you've heard it, this is pretty funny.) Actually, Noah was willing to sing anything but the Goodbye song today.


Noah really loves playing with other kids and doesn't get as many opportunities to do so now that he's out of full-time daycare. I think he'll be really happy when Nursery school starts in the fall.

one more?

Why do I think I want another baby? I'm not sure I really do. You see these exhasuted women on a baby story saying how happy they are that this is their last baby, or that their family is complete. Now, there were moments in labour (yup, even in my short 2.5 hour labour) where I was sure I was never ever going to go through that again, but within the week of Molly's birth, I was already thinking and talking about next time.

I think one of the main reasons for this is that I had a great birth experience (thank you Toni and Carolyn!) - I may get around to posting my birth story at some point, and a really easy pregnancy. I felt good. I looked great. Molly latched on and continues to breastfeed really well. I'm good at the "new" Mommy stuff, but I'm pretty sure that's not a good enough reason to bring another child into the world.

The two most compelling reasons I have for not having another baby are: our finances and my age. If I could wait another 5 years for our financial situation to change (improve) then I don't think I would obsess about it. I could just wait and see.

So, no answers today. I think I'm really just trying to clarify the questions. No doubt I will have more to say about this later.